My son the other day was a little down in the dumps. We have a NO SECRETS rule in our house. All three of us follow it. When I saw him feeling some kind of way, I quickly asked what was wrong. He confessed that he felt uncomfortable feeling sentimental.
He has always been an extremely intense and sensitive being. His big feelings bring big thoughts. Big thoughts can often turn into irrational fears.
He expressed how he felt that his uncontrollable feelings placed him at a disadvantage. He felt like he could not accomplish the goals and expectations he had set for himself. These feelings would swoop in and highjack his consciousness.
Most people who know me know that he got his intensity from me. Some people have met an unbridled version of that energy, and I am sure they could tell you some undesirable narrative. I have come to understand that energy as I have grown older, and I have learned to control it most of the time. My family calls my other side the kraken. I have not spoken to the kraken in quite a while. There is just no need to unleash her.
On the flip side, strong energy can be used for good. It is what helps me get a lot done. It helps me to connect with empathy driven awareness. It also supports my hobbies and my to-do lists. Travel is a focus in our lives, and the powerful energy takes you places.
My son and I spent the one-hour car ride from Davenport to Lakeland talking about how we are perfectly made. We don’t need to pray our challenges away but instead try to figure out God’s purpose in them. Of course, extreme sensitivity could create some trials, but if we start out our day reminding ourselves that we are perfectly made we can try to use every tool in our toolbox to get where He wants us to be. All that energy channeled in the right direction will lead to a feeling of peace.
David said, “Oh! So, I don’t need to stop being emotional. God made me this way because he wants to use my big feeling for His purpose.”
I could have cried. I love that David felt consoled and he could stop tormenting himself wanting to be different, but more importantly I loved how he was learning to let go and let God.
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