June 3, 2025 – What is the last thing I said to you?

It feels like an unnecessary, overdramatic way to end a conversation. A few words that cure everything, break down walls, build connection and, on occasion, can cause an awkward chain reaction. A battle emerges between forced reciprocation and deep entrega.

I say it when it matters most.

I say it even when you don’t listen.

I say it when you are mad.

I say it when I know you already know.

I say it when it might feel out of place.

I say it louder when something inside me fights against it.

I say it in acceptance of your faults.

I say it in hope of your forgiveness for mine.

I say it even when you don’t say it back.

I say it because today might be the last.

Dramatic as that might sound, we all know someone who left suddenly.

We would give anything to hear them say it one more time.

Living far away from family and friends, I sometimes feel vulnerable—at times unsafe. My heart beats a little faster thinking about statistics, distance, experiences. I could allow myself to get lost in the unwanted darkness. But I rest.

I rest safely in my peaceful world where the last thing I said to you was, “I love you.”

“But the greatest of these is love.” – 1 Corinthians 13:13